A breath from disaster

Having been around a number of different leather communities I have noticed a recurring theme or arch-type. The one step ahead of disaster Master. These folks seem to be just ever so slightly ahead of the disaster curve. Time and again things blow up and if they aren't at the epicenter they are very near it.

I really have to give them credit, they have great publicist or something, because none of the fecal matter that spews ever sticks to them. They constantly rotate through s-types, breaking one after another with unsafe acts, or destroy whatever self-esteem or pride there may be, but it is never their fault. This lifestyle has lost more than one s-type to just such a person.

How do we as a community prevent this? How do we as a community stop this from happening. Much the same way we would in any other aspect of our lives. If a person comes to you asking your opinion of someone what do you say? Do you take the harder path and be honest, or do you want everyone to keep liking you and say nothing? By that omission you are just as guilty as the person who does these things. If you have seen questionable activity and someone who is considering entering into a relationship with that person asks you, be honest. For the record honesty is not the same as maliciousness. You don't need to talk them down, but do be honest about what you have seen first hand. Don't be shy about it, or refer them to someone who does have first hand knowledge of what they are like.

Most "specialty" communities are very closed knit and it seems that everyone has dated or had a relationship with everyone else, and this is how the abuse or neglect or (insert negative event here) keeps happening. Nobody will stand up and say this person did (insert negative event here).

This is not without a price, bravery begets backstabbing and bickering and very possibly being excluded from certain groups. But in the end, what is Our responsibility? Are We not the Dominants? Is it not Our responsibility to protect Our community? If not then are We just playing at it?